Around The World In 80 Waves

Neil and I are staying in the Newmarket Gardens Caravan Park, which is the closest caravan park to the centre of Brisbane.

That is handy because it is already very late when we return from our night out in the city, and then suspect wake up half the camp site getting in and out of our ‘Whizz-banger’.

(I have discovered this is the nickname given to the sliding door on our type of campervan due to the noise people make when answering the call of nature in the middle of the night!) 

To say neither of us is feeling too clever the following morning is an understatement of epic proportions and I am only just feeling sober enough to drive by the time it is necessary to take Neil to the airport.

We get there with plenty of time before his flight north to Cairns to catch up with family there, and do so without getting lost. Doing so is most unlike me, but after saying goodbye and wishing each other well until we catch up again back in the UK, I quickly return to form. I get lost so many times that I keep having to go through the toll road under the airport annoyingly incurring toll charges each time I do so. I then have issues trying to pay because I cant tell them how many charges are due when I ring up to do so. 

By the time I get back to the camp site (where I have extended my stay for a few days to catch up on the blog because their technology and mine work without issue) I am shattered and do nothing more than get a take away from around the corner.

The following day I get the van rigged for solo running, and am very happy that I will not need to be sleeping in the coffin any more, or indeed having to go through the bikram yoga process that was entailed in me getting in or out of bed! Whilst relaxing there and writing a few posts I manage to get in touch with an old flat mate of mine called Susan who left London to return to Brisbane, who you see here.

Sadly Susan is too busy with temporary parental responsibilities to catch up with me whilst I am in town, but gives me some great recommendations for what else I should see whilst in the city.

I take one of the free ferry boats on a trip right up and down the length of the river to take in the sights. As well as admiring the impressive skyline I visit the south bank where there are loads of museums and other things going on.

Brisbane is actually some way inland, but being the beach loving nation that Australia is they don’t let that stop them having fun.

Halfway along the South Bank I discover this man made beach which has been installed so that you can still get sand in between your toes even in the middle of the city.

I have a lovely day wandering about in the sunshine and get out of town just before it starts to chuck it down with rain. Once more I am heading north in the direction of the Sunshine Coast.

It is time for Neil and I to leave the Gold Coast and head north to Brisbane from where he will be catching his ongoing flights. We arrive on Saturday night and have been given the recommendation that we head for the Fortitude Valley area of the city.

Upon arrival I can see why! The whole night I was staggered by the parade of legs marching past.

I have seen so many great pins knocking about since I was buying sewing supplies in California!

We dive straight into the action but have a bit of trouble getting into some places due to the licensing requirements of Australia where you need ID to get into most clubs and we sensibly decided to leave the important documents safely locked up in the campervan.

We turn on the charm though and despite our shoes preventing us getting into one place are generally allowed in due to being over twice the drinking age.

We eventually find our spot and then spend most of the evening in a club called The Press Club, whose interior you see here. It was however considerably busier that the picture I found on their website and in particular I will always remember one lady you seemed to have a voice that only dogs could hear who kept screeching in our ears. All good fun and plenty of eye candy whilst we had a beer or ten.

At the end of the night you can imagine my surprise when we stopped for a bite to eat at Pie Face on the way home, and I discovered that the answer to the time honoured question of “Who ate all the pies?” is in fact leggy Queensland females. Go figure!

It is a glorious day and it seems like the whole of the Gold Coast has got in the water at the south end of Rainbow Beach, which is known as Snapper Rocks.

Neil and I find a parking space in the car park on the Greenmount headland at the north end of the bay, and from there you can see why so many people were in the water here.

Snapper Rocks is one of the stops on the ASP world tour, and watching the glorious waves break right across the bay and then around the Greenmount headland you can see why.

It is particularly busy in the water because it is a Saturday and the whole surfing world wants to be in getting wet at the weekend. As a consequence I decide to leave that break for a mid week session and then paddle out next to the headland to have a crack at the waves that you can surf around into Greenmount Bay in front of the town of Coolangatta.

Even at this, the smaller end of the break, the waves were epic and under the scorching sun you can see that my camera was getting fogged up in the heat whilst I was having so much fun.

There was a good vibe in the water and I had a blast. I have consecutive pictures showing me riding one wave for nearly a minute of which this is one, but there is only so much looking at my shins that I think you want to do so I will save the rest just for myself.

Ever since my first surf back in North Wales in the early eighties I have always wondered about Burleigh Heads because its name was right under my nose whilst paddling out.

As a consequence I have been really looking forward to getting in the water at one of Australia’s classic right hand point breaks. 

Sadly on the day I am in town there is not much swell about and even though the waves are breaking along the rocks lining the shore there are not many people in the water, which in this surf mad part of the world means there were probably better waves on offer elsewhere.

However as soon as I get in the water I am not easily getting out past the broken waves and amazed by the sweeping current which sends me off down the coast towards Surfer’s Paradise.

One quick chat with the lifeguard later and I am aware that apparently it is nothing compared to normal. He was really helpful though and gave me a few pointers to get out which I did with relative ease after walking back around the bay to the rocky point.

The waves were far bigger and more powerful than I expected once there and I bagged a few peaches, charging down the line along the coast.

A lifetime’s surf career of expectation wasn’t disappointed in the end and I was on my game too, trying not to look too much of a kook to the people watching from the shore.

The waves were actually so powerful that in one wipeout my leash actually got ripped off my leg also sending my board careering off towards the rocks at the same time.

I had to give it my best Ian Thorpe impression to get to my board before it got damaged, only just managing to do so. However that left me on the inside section again and having already spent half an hour literally paddling against the tide I didn’t have too much appetite for more and caught the next one in.

During my travels my sister has scanned this blurry picture, which shows me surfing the north shore of Llandudno, which is in many ways a considerable distance from the north shore of Hawaii!

The quality of the scan is not that great but the things to note from it are that my wetsuit had no arms or legs despite me surfing in the middle of winter in the UK, and that I am proudly holding up my first board which was a Dick Van Straalen 7’2″ loaned to me by Peter Kraus.

The board was shaped in Burleigh Heads which is just south of Surfers Paradise so I convince Neil to join me on a grail quest to try and find the person who shaped it.

We head towards the original location of his workshop, only to discover that he is no longer based there, after a fire bombing incident in the eighties!

Asking around the area we are lucky that one of his former neighbours knows where the workshop moved to and he kindly passes the address on to us.

A short drive later and I am pulling up outside the Dick Van Straalen workshop.

I am lucky that the shaper who produced my board, whose real name is actually Dirk rather than Dick, is working when we arrive. I show him a picture of my old board and he can instantly tell me what it was made for, when and the history of the logo used at the time.

Many modern boards are mass produced using computer lathes, but the Dick Van Straalen brand continues to build bespoke boards now under the banner of Classic Waterman and I have a great chat with him about design development and some of the projects he is working on.

Dirk tells me how the local breaks have changed since the introduction of high rise blocks along the coastline, and the impact of dredging the sand off the coast, which is fascinating.

I’m not the only former customer to call by while I am there and Dirk makes time for all of us. A top bloke who I am thrilled to have met, and the whole experience takes me back to my first ever surfs.

Speaking of which time to get in the water again, me thinks.

It had started raining heavily again whilst getting out of our surf clobber at Belongil Beach so we took the decision to push north over the border into Queensland and find a place to stay in the town called Surfer’s Paradise.

Contrary to all suggestions based on its name the waves there are rubbish, and this fact is exaggerated by all the amazing breaks which can be found nearby elsewhere on the Gold Coast. the town itself is also a bit of a mess at the moment because half of it has been ripped up in efforts to get a light railway installed before the start of the holiday season later in the year.

Slowly navigating through the associate traffic we treated ourselves to a hotel room at the D’Arcy Arms to balance things out after a night in the truck stop.

A quick stop there to make sure all the electrical items were charging properly, and then after freshening up we headed into town.

It was a school night so there wasn’t all that much going on but we did find ourselves in a great club watching the first ashes test and admiring the local wildlife.

Just past Byron Bay we stopped at a quiet stretch of sand known as Belongil Beach, where there seemed to be a degree of doubt about the need for swimwear.

There is a time and a place for everything but I don’t think Neil or I would ever want a Gopro shot of our giblets from the front of my board!

The waves were still small here, but because they were not too daunting Neil decide to have another go on my board.

I picked up this shot of us both looking rather confused as we were getting ready.

Neil felt the water was warm enough not to bother with a wetsuit, and took the first shift in the water. I didn’t mind because straight after he did so a fantastic looking young lady came bouncing down the beach in a bikini, so skimpy it barely contained her on her lunchtime run. She was obviously taking the advice re wearing clothing at this beach very seriously!

I don’t mind telling you it was a joy to behold, and sadly my efforts at getting Neil back out of the water with the camera so that you could share the experience were woefully too slow.

Meanwhile Neil was trying to battle out past the shore break, as you see here. However I must report that he wasn’t in the water that long on this occasion. During his session Neil was afflicted with an experience I know all too well on this trip. You are sat on the board waiting for a wave when an un-expecting arm or leg gets brushed by an innocuous bit of seaweed or equivalent drifting in the water.

Given some of the wildlife knocking around it puts a shiver down your spine which is quite unsettling, and then places a whole host of thoughts in your head that are not great travelling companions at such time!

Once the baton had been passed I paddled out and snagged a couple of tiny waves. this was the best picture, but it flatters to deceive about how poor conditions actually were.

Not to worry though it is another wave towards my target which is now within sight.

After my Tiger Shark free surf at Lennox Head we had a short drive north to arrive in Byron Bay. Even though it was just past 11.30am we had already been up for hours and were feeling like lunch so found ourselves at the Byron Beach Cafe.

It is a beautiful location from which you could see the break known as The Pass in the distance, but personally I found the cafe more than a bit pretentious. “Sir, we are not ready for lunch at this time” Oh I’m sorry I thought you were a cafe. I almost managed to bite my lip, but not not quite, and satisfied myself with ordering a beer with my breakfast because I knew me lowering the tone would irritate the waiter.

The food was good though and I have to say the beer that was brewed locally was pretty tasty too.

After our breakfast/lunch we went for a stroll along the beach towards the lighthouse to check out the break known as The Pass. Despite being quite small it was absolutely mobbed in the water and I decided to save the break for the return leg back towards Sydney hoping that it would be a little quieter and a bit bigger then.

We walked all the way along the beach to the island where a flight of steps has been built so that you can climb  the mound and get a closer look at the surfers and the break,

Looking back down the beach you can see what great rides are on offer here. I’m looking forward to it already.

After our early start from the truck stop we were moving quickly and arrived at Lennox Head just as the cafes were opening. Lennox Head is one of Australia’s classic right hand point breaks and I had been looking forward to surfing it.

Sadly the swell direction was wrong for the point, meaning that the waves were largely just crashing on the rocks that line the shore there as opposed to breaking all along the headland. 

Not to worry I will get a second chance at the point later on my travels. Everybody else was heading for the waves breaking on the beach in front of the town so I decided to do likewise, but not until Neil and I had grabbed a coffee.

At the till the young lady serving took great delight in telling me to watch out for the 10′ tiger shark which had been regularly cruising through the break in recent weeks. Great! Thanks for that. It was just what I needed before paddling out!

On this piece of advice Neil decided to pass on the session, leaving me to paddle out across the inshore to the spot where the waves were breaking. Sadly my Gopro ran out of battery almost as soon as I got in the water so I took solace in knowing that at least there would not be any footage of my untimely demise in the water.

There were a few people out, with the usual smattering of SUPs (Stand Up Paddle boards) hogging the break. I haven’t got a real problem with any surf craft, just the owners of them and today there was one old bloke who wasn’t even satisfied with taking the lions share of waves, and started dropping in on mine as well. 

As ever you wouldn’t mind so much if the person concerned looked like this but he didn’t and I told the crusty old goat where to get off, after which he gave me enough space to catch plenty of my own in the head high and clean waves. I was out for a few hours with no signs of of the Tiger Shark too, which was a result.

After my late afternoon session at Coffs Harbour and a post surf ham and cheese sandwich we jumped in the van and headed north once more through the rain.

The weather was filthy and we had a long way to go but we made good time in the darkness. In search of an evening meal we found a pub in Ballina and walked in just in time to see the first balls of this series of The Ashes being bowled.

We had a great meal and sat on the sidelines whilst the rest of the pub finished off the pub quiz that had been going on all night. I knew loads of the answers but had to bite my tongue. I hate people with quiz-tourette syndrome.

After the meal and a few beers we rolled back out of town to guerilla camp at the truck stop we had seen on the way in. On a year long trip you always have to watch the budget a little bit and parking out the way we weren’t bothering anybody.

We just wanted to avail ourselves of the facilities in the morning, and it was a quiet night. We did not meet any ladies like those in this B movie whilst there. Sadly!